Easter Activity

I let my toddler watch a show and make messes while I got this activity ready today! One day I'll think of putting together activities ahead of time...maybe!

We subscribe to The Friend magazine. We modified the activity on this page a bit. I "laminated" (with packaging tape) the pictures of Christ and the corresponding quotes to some card-stock circles I punched out of scraps.

I had my son hide in the other room as I hid them around the living room. As he found each one we looked at the picture and read the story on the back. Then he put it in his bag and got to go find another one. It was a fun way to make telling the story of Jesus Christ and His atonement, crucifixion, and resurrection a bit more interactive.

After we "played" it once, I hid them again and Jeremy got to collect them and put them in his Easter basket instead of the bag. He really liked that. On the second go-around I had him tell me what was happening in the picture. I was surprised how quickly he already committed to memory many of the scenes and events we had just discussed. 

I look forward to being able to store this with our Easter decorations and use it in the future too. Maybe some years older kids can help hid them while the younger ones look for them. For now, we'll see if this activity will keep Jeremy's interest a few more days this week. I hope so! It was a fun little thing to make and do. 

Train up a child

I don't care if my child ends up being a straight A student (it'd be nice, but it doesn't really matter). I don't care if he knows how to read before he gets to first grade. I don't care if he even knows all of his colors. All of that will come and will be what it is.

Playing and building character is exhausting. I'm exhausted.

That's all there is to it. When you are working to create a life of exploration through play, and art, and books it's exhausting. But what might be really getting to me is staying strong to always follow through with the consequences I've outlined. It's simply exhausting.

I know, I know, joy in the journey. I find that a lot of the time. I smile at my cute naked kids in the tub playing and splashing together. And I grin check to check as I can induce laughter from tickles. And I'm tickled by the cute things a toddler can say.

But the truth is I am hoping there is some payback for my hard work. Some payback for being patient and disciplining my child for dumping his breakfast bowl and over-priced goat milk on to the floor again for the the umpteenth time. Some payback for keeping my cool when I'm getting kicked and whined at just because I'm hauling off a child to change a poopy diaper (trust me kid, I don't want to be changing it either!) I am just praying that all of my diligence and repetition:

"Use your words"
"Tell my why you're upset"
"Are you mad because . . . ?"
"Mommy doesn't respond to whining, how do you ask nicely?"
"Say thank you"
"We don't [hit, throw that at, dump it on, feed that to, step on] sister"
"That was wrong, because you ignored what mommy asked"
"Uh, oh. Jeremy's not listening"

I am hoping all this will have its payback. That it will somehow yield a respectful and responsible child, who uses his manners, and can communicate his feelings in healthy ways, and is obedient to his parents.

I am praying that each little moment of repetition, each moment of patience, each moment of consistency will somehow and in some way pay off. Please may this be like my piggy bank and with each moment I diligently deposit let there be a return in my investment.

Yet I fear. I fear, Am I doing this the right way? Am I expecting too much? Too little? Have I been inconsistent? Is this one my fault because I kept him up too late/didn't feed him soon enough? Haven't been giving enough attention? 

Sigh.

So I pray. I pray in the morning. I pray in my heart. And I pray in the moment.

Please, God, please help me know how to teach my children obedience. If they can learn to be obedient to their earthly parents, maybe, just maybe, they can learn to be obedient to Thee as well. If they can respect others then perhaps they can respect things grander than themselves . . . respect things of grandeur -- sacred things and noble things. Things of God and Country. 

So I pray a mother's prayer. I pray that teaching to not throw a cereal bowl and spoon or step on books is more, so much more, than just that.

Amazing: first half-day on a structured schedule

Oh my goodness! I mentioned yesterday when I was talking about our need for routine that today I was going to be implementing a schedule/structure to our day because I was going crazy and my toddler was causing trouble left and right!

It's not even noon and I'm already in love!

Here are good things that have already come out of it:

I don't think we've had any tantrums yet and we haven't destroyed anything/made unnecessary messes! 
Some days are just "off" days for kids and some aren't so maybe this is a good day. But we all woke up with colds and for a sick kid to not be particularly fussy is AMAZING. I think it is largely in part of pacing (the speed at which we're moving) and the plan. If I'm trying to get us ready and out the door Jeremy is doing a contained activity. This morning it was a couple Mormon Message videos while he was strapped in his high chair. I'm not really a fan of TV for kids, but I rather have him watching a brief (3 min) movie with a moral than pulling pulling all of my shoes off the shoe wrack.

Got us ready and out the door quick.
It also made be quick about getting ready to get out the door. I feel like this takes forever! But since I know I had given myself 15 min and Jeremy was only going to watch a few of the little videos I had to think quick and be efficient. Yay for not spending ALL morning just getting myself and the kids ready to go.

We've meet neighbors & seen construction equipment
Being out the door and outside in the morning is a delight. We were able to chat with neighbors while they were gardening or walking kids to school. We also saw the construction in action. Our evening walks were taking us past all the construction stuff once it was just parked and everyone was done for the day.

I got exercise and sunshine in and feel great!
I've been wanting to make exercise a part of my day. Ideally I'd be dancing but I'll take walking/running/jogging as a second option. It really gave me more energy to get through my morning. Normally after a morning of being home trying to entertain Jeremy he was worn out and board and so was I. Not today. Say hello to getting healthy and good bye to extra pregnancy weight!

No crying babies!
So far I was able to off-set the kids perfectly. I was able to nurse Clara before Jeremy was up...well that got off a little this morning so dad helped with Jeremy before he had to leave for work. Then I was able to nurse her while we played in the backyard. She cried a little here and there when I had to sit her down to help Jeremy with things, but not the screaming in the other room "feed me!" or "sleep me!" while my hands are tied with Jeremy's urgent needs.

Able to ask for help (which is SO hard for me, especially because half the time I don't know what I really need)
Like I mentioned before I knew I needed someone to get Jeremy breakfast because I knew I needed to wake and nurse Clara so I could actually ask for that. I also was able to leave them to figure out breakfast problems because I knew I needed just 10 more minutes for my scripture study. And I got it! It felt so good to say, "I can't help you right now" because I was committed to sticking to what I needed to do for myself.

I was happily able to do activities that would normally feel draining or go undone. 
Jeremy wanted to play in the water outside. I didn't really feel up to it, but since I knew outside time was ending in about 15 minutes I could commit to doing it. I know on any day I can choose how long or short an activity is, but sometimes I think I dread it because I don't know what I'll do next. Visions of tantrums as I stop the fun just because I'm tired but don't know what to do next would keep me from doing something fun. Today just knowing I was going to end the fun and shortly have some "me time" was enough to help me be engaged during the moment and actually let him do something fun and be a part of it to. (And would you believe we even stayed out and played longer than planned?! ...partly because we had some timeouts in the middle but we rolled with it and it was great)



Here are some modifications:

We opted for an early nap because Jeremy has a cold. We opted for a morning snack instead of lunch. (The perfect thing for him to be strapped down doing while I swaddled Clara and put her down!) And I'm going to have to modify when to nurse next because she fell asleep 20 mins before the next potential nursing. Still figuring her timing out! I opted to not start Jeremy on his "independent playtime training" because he's sick and we're going to use the pack-n-play for it. He's a little old for play-pen time and really should have room time. But it'll just be part of the training at least until we can make his room more safe (there are shelves he could climb on that aren't the most stable). I also put it off because we're going to have to shuffle our sleeping arrangements Friday night and he'll be sleeping in the pack-n-play and I don't want him to get confused.


Well the kids are asleep. I've taken time to write. I actually have energy and don't think I'll nap (not yet at least). So I'm gonna get the rest of our day ready and take some time for myself! Here's hoping it goes just as smoothly as the morning.

I am grateful God hears my prayers. Answered me with the inspiration that our family needed routine and especially grateful He has given me the patience, energy, and desire to teach so I can improve, love, and grow our little family! In God I am given joy and in Christ I am given strength. 

Confirmation of our need for routine

I had been prayerful about what I need to do to help my family right now and one word came to my mind

ROUTINE

For whatever reason we haven't had great daytime/wake time routines. We have bedtime routines and naptime routines and even silly little routines about where the sauerkraut gets placed on Jeremy's highchair tray (yes my son eats and even likes sauerkraut). I'm not very good at routines. I don't even really have my own morning routine or maybe I will for a while and then it will fade. I'm even so inconsistent about things that my handwriting changes within a page  a sentence no even within a word. So you can see why it might be hard for me to have regular routines. And perhaps something about moving twice, dealing with allergies, sorting out depression, getting robbed, used-car hunting, being pregnant while moving across the country, and having a baby (among other things) has kept our days pretty filled with generally uncommon activities.

But we're coming up on two years of motherhood in action and I definitely have a toddler on my hands. I know structure allows children, well really people in general, but particularly young children to thrive. It's been on my mind and I've been wanting to be more of a proactive and not reactive parent, but I just hadn't made it a priority, but I really wanted to take our family life to a level beyond just survival, eating, and diapers. Even if that is A LOT of our day I felt in my heart that there must be a way to give my children more. Not that life isn't good and we are indeed surviving (I am dumbfounded at how many times I've gotten dinner on the table with two children!) And there are calm tender moments of brother insisting on holding Clara (even if she cries), and laughter, and books, but there also seems to be much more chaos than what I think is necessary.

So as I am reading about structure and schedules for toddlers in my free time in the middle of the night while I'm nursing, it's reaffirmed that discipline problems and acting out occur more when there is lack of structure.

And it was this moment today...

I turn my back and my son has pulled the finger-painting that my husband and I made on the 4th of July off the fridge and is tearing it in to little shreds.

And this one ...

My son walks in to the kitchen bringing I don't know what to me saying "no no." As I discover he has ripped out the lining of one of my high heals.

And this one ...

I am trying to fix dinner and Jeremy is literally tugging on my apron and whining "Mamma, mamma."

And this one ...

I am trying to feed and clean one child while another is wailing in the other room because it is also time for her to be fed.

These moments made my realize something really had to change. I had read about structure and it was time to not delay. So I spent at least an hour this evening making a daily schedule for our family. One that will hopefully align everyone's needs (mine included) of eating and needing to be put down for a naps not happening at the same time. And this schedule has more structured activities and independent play time so I can be more involved and catch a break all at the same time.

Ah! This is crazy and overwhelming, but I'm convinced we can find improvement. Even if we don't stick to this schedule I know I'm on the right path.

Here's one of the articles about structure I turned to as guidance when I knew I needed more routine. Used this example and this other mom's schedule as guides for making our first rough draft.



Check out: 
Our first day with structure/schedule